I was browsing amoung Flickr Groups, and found a neat little project that someone has going. The Flickr World Map has 36,539 cities and each time it will load 1200 random ones. It’s pretty nifty.

Click Here to see my smart backyard friends.

I was reading in my Biology book, and it said that Mourning Doves make their nest on the ground. I always thought that they were pretty stupid birds.

It turns out that the ones in my backyard are a little above average. They made their nest in a tree. Maybe their babies are going to be smarter. And their [future] smartness must come from the mom, because the dad looked pretty dumb when he helped build the nest. He stood on the mom’s head and busied himself by jabbing her in the eye with sticks. Despite the fact that they made their nest only 4 feet above the ground, in plain sight, does not make them dumb. Compared to where they should have made their nest, it makes them look very smart. But then again, the options in Arizona are:

1. On the rocks. Bad move because it rained a lot this spring, and rocks get really hot in the day, and really cold at night. Plus, there is always my little sister factor to take in.
2. In the grass. That’s where my Biology book said that Mourning Doves nest. Wait, what grass? I’m in the middle of a desert!
3. On a cactus. The cactus wren makes its nest on a cactus, but they must also be equipped with feet that have no nerves.
4. On a fruit tree. Bing! It seems like the best option from the bird’s point of view.

So that right there explains how my birds are better than yours.

If you ever happen to be rescued by a lifeguard, you should know that there is a big difference between what he/she says and what he/she means…

Says: Please try to kick.
Means: If you don’t kick, we’re both going to drown out here.

Says: You’ll be alright. You’ll be on land in just a minute.
Means: I’ll be alright. I’ll be back on land in just a minute.

Says: How long have you been in the water?
Means: I’m making some small talk so I can catch my breath before I tow you to shore.

Says: Grab the tube (the tube is the red floaty thingy).
Means: Dude, if you don’t grab the tube…

There is also the instance of being talked to even if you aren’t about to drown…

Says: Oh, you aren’t about to drown?
Means: It was getting pretty hot up there in the sun.

Says: Stop running!
Means: Lifeguarding has its off-hours privilages that I’m not about to give up.

And you know that some guards are just dying to see what happens if you break the rules…

Rule: One person at a time on the diving board.
Guard: This is better than WWF Wrestling!

Rule: Bathing Load ___ Persons.
Guard: I like crowd surfing.

Rule: You must be — inches tall to go down slide.
Guard: That kid just broke a luge record!

So now you know the flipside to a lifeguard’s words…

This is a lot harder than it looked at first. I’m doing a research project on the Health Benefits of a Vegetarian Diet, and I don’t even know what some of the benefits are. Diverticular Disease? Renal Disease? yeah.

Johnny Got His Gun
by Dalton Trumbo

It was written between World War 1 and World War 2, but it was not published until after WWII ended. Dalton Trumbo was a member of the Communist Party, and publishers were worried about the sales of an anti-war novel at a time when Liberty Gardens, Uncle Sam, and pro-Democracy ideas were the focus.

This book shows the realities of war. The book is divided into two parts calld “The Dead” and “The Living”. The first part is very depressing. John realizes that he has no arms, no legs, no hearing, no sight, no mouth, and no ability to talk. He is a living mind trapped in a dead person’s body. He fades in and out of consciousness. The book is hard to follow because it is known for little punctuation and long rambling sentences. It isn’t polite English, but war isn’t polite either. Tales about his life before the war are told, but they always end in bitter remarks about how he’ll never be able to do that again.

He tries to commit scuicide, but realizes that there is no possible way for him to kill himself. He is on forced breathing, he has a feeding tube, and he doesn’t have arms or legs. After that, he begins to think. And he tries to keep time.

Only great authors can keep the reader interested in a man that is unable to move or communicate. Excitement comes when John is able to calculate the time between nurse visits, days, and nights, after failed attempts. This brings us to the second part of the book.

In “The Living” things begin to be brighter in John’s life. He figures out that if he moves the only part of his body that he can move, his head, against the pillow, he can tap in Morse Code. He taps SOS every waking hour, hoping that someone will realize and bring him out of loneliness. The nurse thinks that he is crazy, and she gives him a tranquilizer. Enter the chapter about pretty colors, nice music, clouds, and strange people. Then, one night, he gets a new nurse. She finally understands and gets a doctor to look at him. The doctor asks, “What do you want.” He wants to be taken out and about. He wants to show the women that he is their son. He wants to show the girls that he is their brother. He wants to show the men that he is their future. He wants to show the boys that he is war. War is not glorious.

If all of those thousands of boys like him are killed or injured or tortured in a foreign land, for the sake of someone’s democracy, is it really worth it?