From the age 13 my family has lived in a small town north of Tucson. It’s a nice little town, perfect for stopping and robbing a gas station of beer on your drug run to Phoenix.

It has its freedoms, just like any other American town, but wearing some certain colors are to be avoided. Blue, red, and brown are not advisable. Wearing orange isn’t that great either.

So I am armed and ready, thanks to certain males in my life who care.

Here is a picture of my knife and pepper spray. The pepper spray doubles as a key chain, and the knife doubles as a box opener. Or throat opener. Whatev.

I’ve been practicing my self-defense skills on my little brother. Let me tell you, I am getting really good here.

p.s. Arizona ranks #17 in the state list of crimes per capita.
p.p.s.  Tucson is between 1.19 and 2.26 times higher than the national average for crimes per capita.  Lovely.